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Friday, July 1, 2011


The gist of how a Nigerian man killed his wife and chopped her body like a mallam did not escape me. At all oh! I was in shock when I read the story because I nor understand the kind evil spirit wey enter the man.  Women have always suffered abuse since, no be today yansh dey back. But how can you do that to someone you love? Anyway I'm here to table this matter make una judge am! 

I was having a heated discussion with some people, some say the woman naim make we blame (egbami), say maybe she bin dey nag the man. Ok.  Some say na the man make we blame, afterall naim kill the woman. Let me dissect this matter the way I see it!

BLAME 1. I blame the man! Shooo! Imagine the way the wife felt as he was plummeting her and pounding her and then stabbing her...and then chopping her to pieces. Men should stop blaming women for iranu oh. Ahn! Kilosele! So because a girl provokes you na to slap her? when they see their mate outside they cannot fight oh, they will be flexing muscle for omo l'omo! Jor oh! If a guy hits a woman, its not because SHE caused it, its because HE has NO SELF CONTROL. A man who has self control will find it hard to cheat on you and harder to raise his hands on you, not because you don't deserve it, but because he is PRINCIPLED. If you beat your sisters as well, TAKE NOTE!

BLAME 2. I just have to blame women. We try to put up with a lot of nonsense. Ewo ni iranu?! He slaps you the first time, you still continue, belts you the second time, you no Ex am, sotay he kon dey beat you steady. I've said it before, na from clap e dey enter dance. Often, women suffering from Domestic Violence are always trying to save face and don't say it for fear of  'what will people say'. We always know the red lights even while dating. Shoving, pushing and threatening to slap you are red lights. Get out of that relationship fast! Getting married to him will not stop it. Marriage is no cure for a man like that. If you are ready to settle down, don't settle for rubbish!

BLAME 3. Family, Friends and Neighbors. Some how I just have to blame these people sha. If you know your child or friend or neighbor is chopping slap from her man steady why do we encourage them to continue. Is marriage by force? The advice usually dished out is 'your husband is beating you because of something you are doing wrong, go home and submit to your husband and save your marriage'. Everything na Submission! Abeg! 

Ladies, empower yourselves, find yourselves a career and goal apart from Boyfriendry and Husbandry. Most women find it hard to get out of abusive relationships because the man is your EVERYTHING... Give yourself some bargaining power. If you ever decide kpe you love that guy so much you can't leave him even though he dey punch you steady, I will advice you to start self-defense classes, learn karate and buy a gun. If pesin bite your nose and e no fear catarrh when you wan bite im anus no fear shit!


Monday, June 27, 2011

Shoooo! Na me be this?!

Its loads of good news for me today! First of all GISTDOTCOM is a year old!!! *Dancing galala*. I'm so grateful for everyone's comments I no go lie. Your comments make me sleep better at night. I remember the first post I wrote on the blog, na so one 'Anonymous' left a comment saying my blog is rubbish, my post was horrible and I will never be successful. I cried that day ehn...and I deleted my blog. But thanks to my Mr Muscle (my guy), he encouraged me, and told me to blog again. He was even the one that introduced me to blogging, if I dey lie make I naked baff! Somebody even talk say I no sabi spell and I can't speak English *sigh*.

Overall, the good outweighs the bad and I have to  thank everyone that follows, comments and shares links to my blog too. And for every 'LOL', 'LWKMD' 'LMAO' I get in the comments section, I add weight and I become finer! Me love y'all longtime! And you guys are so awesome I got nominated for SIX Categories at the Nigerian Blog Awards! (...If only they were sharing kpekere and kilishi). So please go HERE to vote Sisi Yemmie!!! Go and Pless ya hand there oh!!! 

Make sure you watch this space because I am having a GIVEAWAY soon and I'm sure you don't want to miss it. Don't dull yourself!  I took these pictures on Sunday and I wanted to share them with everyone, cos I'm vain like that! Shout out to my friend Eyi that helped take these pictures!

AGBAYA on the swing! (Lets just say I'm a child at heart)

My Amebor Pose

Don't forget to nominate other BLOGS as well oh! Una weldone oh!!!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Should He forgive Her?

I saw this on twitter and I need your comments. Bear in mind that in as much as we laugh at this and we think it's a joke, e dey happen to some girls in 'real life'.lol. I have heard quite a few stories.

"My girlfriend caught me cheating for the 3rd time last night and threatened to break up with me. I got angry and slapped her twice. She started crying and drove home. Today she sent a text saying she was sorry. I dont know if I should forgive her.  She over-reacted"
So should he forgive her?

Who has been following Big Brother Amplified? Una see the way the Yellow paw-paw lady is just chewinggumming the poor boy, rubbing him up, down, left, center? Shame catch me wey dey watch am sef. Someone said it's like men are getting scarce so babes are hustling. LOL

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Have you been 'toasted' lately?

If you've been 'toasted' lately please tell me about it!lol. I was just walking on my own jejely...with my red lipstick and red coat oh, na so one oyinbo boy just 'waylay' me... 'hey sexy, i like you, you 18?' ....I was confused. I just told him 'excuse me' and waka away briskly...first of all I nor like the angle wey d guy for corner me, you know all these crazy story's I watch on TV don put the fear of oyinbo in me. I sha made sure the guy was not trailing me. I really don't gbadun the way oyinbo boys toast girls, na to dey ask the girl age first ba? mscheeew and una know say 9ja girls no dey gree talk their age!

As I was walking I remembered all the different type of toasting, chyking, runzing I don get for this life... I remember those love letters that always start with the same format ..."Dear girl, i'm taking out my pen from my basket of love...." *sigh* Nobody writes those love letters anymore, or do they? 

I remember...

A. The Dude in a Car
This guy slow down, park well,
Dude:'hey babygirl, the sun is too hot. Can I drop you off?"
Me: No thank you, you're not going in my direction.
Dude: Your direction is my direction baby...
I will rather trek than be used for blood money me paranoid sha.
End of Discussion

B. The Poet (This type na only songs dem dey memorize to toast girls. If you stop them halfway, dem go start again)
Runs up to me...
Poet: "Hello angel, as I was walking down the road my heart says stop, You are more beautiful than any...."
Me: Sorry?do I know you?
Poet: *clears throat* "Hello angel, as I was walking down the road my heart says stop , you are..."
Me: Sorry, im rushing somewhere.
End of Discussion

C. The Cheesy Lyricist (Always giving cheesy recycled pickup lines)
CheesyLyricist: "Was your father a thief?Cos I think he stole the stars and put them in your eyes."
Me: what?
CheesyLyricist: "I mean, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"
Me: *dumb look*
CheesyLyricisit: "What a lovely smile you have, do you use MacCleans toothpaste too?"
what has this boy been reading jor?
End of Discussion

D. The Familiar Guy (They always claim they have met you before...somewhere)
Familiar Guy: "Hi, your face looks familair, have we met before?"
Me: No
Familiar Guy: "Did you attend 'so&so school? how about this&that church? might be.."
Me: I have never seen you before , sorry.
Familiar Guy: "Well, your face looks familiar, my name is fred what is yours..."
Familiar ko, similar ni.
End Of Discussion

The best 'toasting' I got was from my boobookins...he didn't have to say anything at all. *covers face* lol. In the end  it depends on if you're 'feeling the boy shebi??' I bet it's not easy to be a guy Please Share your best/worst pick up lines with me....

Don't forget to nominate on the Nigerian Blog Awards . Please read the instructions before voting and COPY AND PASTE THE FULL URL ( or your vote will not be counted :( Thank you so much!!! Mwaaaaaah!

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Questions that need answers...

Yesterday I raised these questions on  twitter and the responses were awesome.  Below are a few.

e.g RT @ giagerry: Ehn BSNC which calculator did u use abeg? LoolRT @ _BSNC_: @ Sisi_Yemmie 80% romantic 20% selfish.
Definition of open relationships-->RT @ LizYemoja:@ Sisi_Yemmie @ Enilexx You can knack anybody u want and still knack eachother!  #dirtypeople!
LMAO--->RT @ sleekmaju: Wat hapuned to money? RT @ Sisi_Yemmie: Does LOVE really conquer ALL?!

What is greater? The love between a man and woman or mother and child ?

 Is it socially acceptable for women to propose to men?

Is eloping selfish or romantic?

Can open relationships ever work?

How true is the saying 'love is blind'?

Does love really conquer all?

Rate in order of importance; Money, intelligence, humour, looks

Nigerian Blog Awards is here and it's my first time!!! So I would like to encourage you all to go  here read the instructions on the page and nominate for Categories 2, 6, 7, 16, 26, 29, 30. Please make sure you nominate other bloggers as well!!!

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Ernest and Bhoke's Sexcapade #BBA!

Ernest and Bhoke: Na two People do this tin (on International TV)...why are we blaming just her? LOL

How una see am?